This is not to say Nigerian parents are the worst. No, our parents are pretty great. We love them very much. Quirks and all.
Everyone remembers their childhood with nostalgia and longing. Our childhoods were simpler times. But we’re talking about the quirky habits of our Naija parents.
I bet you can already think of a couple. Not to worry. Here are some things you’d never hear from your Naija parents ever in your life:
1. I love you
Oyibo parents can tell you how much they love you. Naija parents ain’t got time for that. They prefer to show you by paying your school fees, feeding you, clothing you etc. That right there is real love the Naija way.
2. You’re right
Lol, Naija parents are NEVER wrong. They are always right. Even when they are wrong, they are still right.3. I’m sorry
Our parents don’t like to apologize. Ever. If you like be backed by the entire world, you will never the words “I’m sorry”. Biko, move on.
4. Don’t go to Church
The day your overly religious parents tell you “don’t go to church”, just be sure your real parents have been kidnapped by aliens.
5. Can I come in?
Ha! In a house where they pay rent or own, your room is their eminent domain. Your door should magically open as soon as they get there.
6. I once failed an exam
Our parents are Einsteins. They have never failed any exams or ever gotten a C in their lives. They were always first in their classes and grade A was always their birthright. Or so they will have us believe.
7. You can choose your career
Lol, just grow up first. Naija parents have already sorted your future career for you. Choose career by yourself…*laughs in Yoruba*… I can’t even!!
8. What do you want to eat?
The only time you’d hear this is if you’re seriously sick. If not, it is what is available that you will eat.
9. Keep the change
Keep what! After the errand, you must remit every single extra or balance that comes from the said errand.
10. Don’t worry I’ll clean up
Ha! Why would your Naija parents clean up when they have a dishwasher, washing machine, vacuum cleaner, window washer all rolled into one in form of you, their child?
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